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Wide Open Wednesday at Utah Motorsports Campus (UMC) Formerly Miller Motorsports Park

Wide Open Wednesday is a ton of fun. Miller Motorsports Park was built in 2006 and bore the name until it was purchased by another company in 2015 following the death of Larry Miller a couple years prior. It’s now called Utah Motorsports Campus and it’s back with tons of great events on and off road.

Here’s the lineup before we were allowed onto the track and pit area. That’s a 2016 M2, Camaro SS, Z06, GT350, STI, 328, 2009 M3, and a few more in there.

Wide Open Wednesday (WOW) is typically the first Wednesday of each month during the summer. Pay $25 and run what you brung. You can even spring for some 100 octane unleaded if you’re feeling crazy and think it will make a difference in your lap time like me. It’s $9.27 per gallon but makes you feel reallly cool. Also if you’re not running catalytic converters feel free to burn the 110 octane leaded stuff. Totally full of booyah, that stuff. Makes my dirtbike run like a champ.

One of the fun things about WOW is you’ll see all kinds of people there. You’ve got the quintessential douchebag with a brand new M3 or M2, the total garbage-fest group of Honda Civics with nothing but a muffler delete, and everything in between. I hope to become one of those M3 douchebags soon.

This is a measly 2009 M3 but still a very cool car. High-revving V8 and some very sticky tires. This guy wasn’t a douchebag, just very talkative a little odd.

This is a highly modded car, had a big nasty turbo, racing seats, and removable steering wheel. I guess part of the point of that is so you can actually get inside the car – the seats have such high lateral supports that your leg literally wouldn’t fit past the wheel if you tried to climb in.

Ye Olde 110 octane. Only $9.09 per gallon!

This rig was nuts – dude put an LS1 out of a GTO in a teeny tiny 318 BMW. It sounded great but very much not how you’d expect a little beemer to meow.

Guess I forgot to take any pictures of my car, oh well. It was a blast to do this again, last year I only made it out once. I got up to 92mph on the back straight but keep in mind this was only the 1-mile course and not the full 2-miler with that huge massive straight section it normally has. Also we were limited to cone gates so not as many people would go flying off the track into the dirt, although a few still did. I’m looking at you, yellow and blue all-body-work and no suspension parts, tires, or brakes Honda. Try to keep it on the tarmac next time. That said I came pretty close to sliding off myself a few times haha. Highly recommended.

How to turn your kid into Napoleon himself: 2016 Radio Flyer Model S

Radio Flyer is known for their trusty red wagon – a rocketship, a space station, a pet hauler, an imagination platform with endless possibilities. You could even drag it up a hill and turn the handle around in an attempt to steer yourself to victory. Enough space for 2 or 3 kids, powered by developing muscles.

Now let’s turn our attention to their latest creation – the Radio Flyer Tesla. A car with a very specified purpose – to the be the king of the hill in childhood superiority. Space for one, an aux outlet for your kid’s iPhone, and enough room in the “frunk” for a tiny backpack full of supplies so he can run away from the dad who is never home and misses birthdays. Complete with personalized plate and parking sign! Alright!!

Not to be too harsh on the dads who spring for the fully-optioned $645 Tesla Model Kid, it’s only a couple hundred more than your average power wheels. But who the heck grew up actually owning one of those? It’s only a couple steps away from pony in my book. I can, however hypocritically, imagine myself buying one if I had kids right now But only if they were under the age of 5, after that you have to spring for real powersport equipment like a CRF 50 or TRX 90.

The Tesla Radio Flyer even has the same type of charging input as the big guy! Soooo cool how the tail light opens up to reveal the charging hole. Super spiffy little car.

So are you in? Well too bad hope that birthday isn’t coming up too soon because they’re all sold out for a few months.

BMW Performance Driving School – 2 Day Car Control Class in Spartanburg, SC

I give you the happiest place on earth.

Recently I had the opportunity to be a stow away on a friend’s private Jet that was headed from Salt Lake City to North Carolina. That in and of itself was a very cool experience aboard a 1994 Bombardier LearJet 60. Very fast, very smooth aircraft.

I decided that if I was going all the way to Greensboro NC that I might as well drive down to Spartanburg SC and indulge in a little BMW fun. That particular week all they had was a 2 day car control school so that’s what I signed up for.

The school starts off with some really great hot chocolate (I’m not a coffee drinker) and introductions to your teachers. We were lucky enough to be instructed by none other than the Guiness World Record holder for the longest continuous drift – Johan Schwartz. He is also two time winner of the Pirelli World cup racing series. Very cool guy from Denmark who knows his stuff.

The first thing we did was hop into an M235i and do some slalom exercises. Then it was off to the skid pad in a 340i which was probably my favorite part of the whole experience other than the “BWM Buffet” on the last day where you drive an M3, Z4, M6, and X6M one right after another on a closed course at full tilt.

We also did some “autocross” stuff with the M235’s where you are timed in driving through a slalom with a wet U-turn. The second day also had some romping in an X5 which was somewhat interesting although the course was a bit cheesy and most of us probably wanted to jump the thing rather than drive slowly through 30″ of water.

On the last day they take you for a “hot lap” in one of the cars, this one is of Johan blasting through the mini course on one end of the performance center.

If this looks like good times to you, the 2-day car control course is $1550 but if I buy it for you and you pay me back you get 20% off because I have a BMW credit card The 2 day M performance course is $2900 and that’s the one I’d like to do next. It’s more race training and you get a bit more time behind the wheel of strictly M cars. They have tracks for this in SC and LA.

Here’s another video of their “Hot Lap” for people who are picking up a brand new car from the performance facility. You get to try you new car out on a track and get some professional instruction with it.

Correction: The really perfect bike for you – 2016 Yamaha FZ-07

A couple months back I wrote an article about the Ducati Scrambler, singing its praises. I don’t take anything away from that article but I’d like to add an element of reality to the mix: price. The Yamaha FZ-07 is faster, more fuel efficient, and nearly HALF the price of the Ducati. And it’s even the same class of standard-but-kind-of-dual-sport bikes.

At $6990 for a brand new one, you won’t find a better value other than maybe a 2015 model FZ-09 for $7600 but those are a bit overpowered for the average rider. Even the pros all say the 09 felt like it was trying to kill them.

The FZ-07 has a vertical twin, 689cc “Crossplane Concept” motor that is extremely impressive in low and midrange power creation. From 0-5500 rpm it’s honestly not far off from the 899 Panigale or other larger two cylinder bikes. And the low and midrange power completely demolishes 4 cylinder bikes even as large as an FZ1. The fuel injection works like magic, starts right up, idles well, and gives the feeling of control and precision.

At 479 lbs it’s one of the lightest street bikes on the road, even 50lbs+ lighter than competing bikes like the SV650 and the Ninja 650 with similar power output (65hp, 45 lb ft) giving the FZ the edge in performance and responsiveness.

Although it doesn’t have fancy upside-down forks or fully adjustable suspension, the ride is predictable and controllable. The seating position and well-placed ergonomics make it a very comfortable bike to ride although you may want a windscreen if you’re going farther than about 50 miles in one go.

The brakes are on-par with the best of them with four piston calipers up front and a two piston unit in the rear with wave rotors all around. The styling and controls really make this bike feel like it’s a $10-$12k machine and certainly not a bargain buy.

Pretty much can’t beat the fun per dollar value on this bike.

Ileta Forte, by Kia

Kia’s kind of suck. Here’s some data:

Friend’s 2014 Kia Sorento w/ 26k mi – threw a rod

Sister’s 2009 Kia Rio w/ 62k mi – threw a rod

Sister’s 2012 Kia Sedona w/ 55k mi – no a/c, total transmission failure

Other sister’s 2009 Kia Sedona w/ 68k mi – no a/c, multiple electrical fires

If you’re a Simpsons fan, you’ll know that Bart likes to prank call Moe’s Tavern asking for someone with a funny name like Ivana Tinkel or Amanda HugnKiss. Pretty sure Ileta Forte is on there, too. I rented a Kia Forte for a business trip in Virginia recently and it, too, sucked a bit. Can’t really argue with the price at $15,990, that’s cheap for any new car. But for that same money, and I’m only going to say this once, get a freakin used Honda or Toyota.

It’s not a terrible looking car by any means and I was pleased to discover that it wasn’t plagued by a CVT. The 1.8L 4cyl adequately powers the car with all of its 145 ponies galloping ahead but you’d really expect better than 26 mpg out of a car this gutless.

Conclusion: don’t buy a Kia.

2016 Dodge: Another Day Another Challenge…er.

When the first Dodge Challenger you drive is the SRT Hellcat it sort of spoils any chance for the other models to make a good impression. However, it doesn’t take an upscale automotive pallet to taste the Burger King quality of the entry level Challenger.

It’s an obvious throwback to 1960’s muscle cars and that’s great for the target market who’s likely buying this car. For most people, however, the Challenger is a behemoth nautical vessel boasting average performance and efficiency with very little room for passengers.

Let’s start with the size. 4000lbs is a bit on the chubby side for a 2+2 vehicle these days and it shows in the city mileage. You’re lucky to get 18 mpg and that’s carrying around a 6.3 second 0-60 number. Hardly what you’d expect from a claimed 305 horsepower. There are Toyota Camry’s on the road right now with a claimed 276 hp that will run a 5.6.

Another downfall of the husky Challenger is visibility. The hood is enormous. I’m sure it provides large amounts of nostalgia for some, but for most it’s a popped tire on a curb or parking lot ding waiting to happen. It’s fairly hard to tell where your giant nose is pointing half the time. The cabin feels a bit like a chopped hot rod’s and zero rear visibility reminds you of that at every blind spot check. Not exactly a safety-mobile.

The dashboard layout overall works well enough and the digital control of car status works well. Most of the buttons, however look silly with their huge font and larger than necessary size. That part feels very “Dodge”.

A couple redeeming factors that really scream ‘Murica are the large, easily accessed cup holders, the range, and ability to run on regular; which all coincidentally reference drinking. The cup holders are even illuminated via some nice LEDs hey! As for range you can go about 450 miles on one tank if you’re on the freeway most of the time. That’s way above average for the 2016 model year, nice job Dodge! Some pretty serious road trip capability there. Nice thing about being somewhat low-tech is being able to run on the cheap stuff. I just filled up for under $30 @ $1.69 per gallon! These are strange times.

If you love the challenger style and can’t be without one do yourself a favor and spring for something with a V8. It doesn’t make it nicer to own on the day to day but at least it will be fast.

2015 Tesla Model S P85D: Rocket Space Car from Planet Barf.

Don’t let the title get you down: this is a rocket space car first. The barf only comes as a result of our weak human stomachs.

You may have heard that the P85D does 0-60 in 3.1 seconds but then Tesla lovingly came out with an over-the-air software update that gave people “ludicrous” mode and whittled that number down to 2.7. That’s very quick to 60 mph by nearly any standard. One thing you must understand, however is that this car will go 0-40mph in 1.5 seconds. That’s not acceleration. That’s gunfire. There’s your puke party. When you floor it from a stand-still it really feels like you’re being launched into space.

If you’re into internet you’ve probably seen The Oatmeal’s take on the Model S. It’s an impressive tribute from a self proclaimed non-car guy. It’s a bit crude and boils down to asking Elon Musk for a donation to his Nikola Tesla museum but he does bring some some very good points. One of which is the singularity this car shoves in our faces: you don’t need to burn gasoline to get around. This seemingly obvious fact has been challenged unsuccessfully for about 100 years and Tesla is the first one to really pull it off. That’s pretty darn impressive when you consider a few global brands have given it a shot.

And did you know the Model S can carry 7 people!? Pretty insane, although it’s not 7 full-sized adults, it’s bringing flex seating back station wagon style.

The final 2 seats are more kid-sized but when you’re hauling 7 people around chances are some of them are going to be sub-100 pounders. Although this seems like a risky proposition you can rest easy knowing that the Model S is the only car to get a 5 star safety rating on every test and the only car to break the machine trying to test how strong it is.

If you’ve ever wanted the coolness of having a trunk up front without the mid-engine price, Tesla is for you. Just look at this front trunk! You can put things in there and fulfill every single one of your childhood dreams.

If you were wondering about the name, the 85 part stands for the wattage of the motor and the D part stands for “dual” motors, as in one for the front and one for the rear. What helps the P85D achieve it’s “ludicrous” acceleration is the fact that it’s all-wheel drive, which helps in the snow, too.

The central screen that controls the climate, radio, and settings can only be described as super gigantic. It’s the focal point of the interior because you pretty much can’t see anything else.

Controls are easy to find and it’s fairly straightforward to operate but it’s a little scary trusting so much to a touch screen when you’re used to physical nobs. It’s nice to grab something of substance when you’re too warm or want to change the station if more of that hipster garbage music comes on.

One advantage, however, to all the software business is that Tesla can make your car cooler overnight while you’re sleeping. In addition to making it accelerate faster they can make your car self-driving. And have. All of a sudden Model S’ss’ around the nation were updated with a “semi-autonomous” function where if you pull back twice on the cruise control lever it will guide itself down your current path, hands free, feet free. It’s mentally straining to let the car take over but it’s magical golden joy sauce when it works. It’s sort of unbelievable. You’re supposed to keep your hands lightly on the wheel, however, even in this semi-auto mode. It’s not perfect I guess but in my experience using it I was very impressed and found myself trusting it’s abilities more and more. All hail our new overlord: the mythical blue lines of semi-autonomous driving.

Facts about this car that actually matter to anyone wanting one:

Price for the good one: $130k
Range: claimed 280 miles, real world: 220
Time to full charge at home: 8 hrs
Time to 80% charge at supercharger: 45 min
Charging port: painfully cool that they located INSIDE the taillight. A section swings open to reveal a glowing electro-snake receptacle.

So while the P85D is way out of reach for the lay person, it’s proof that the electric car is not only possible, but it can be luxurious and fun. While some people may have thought he Model X was going to be the Tesla available to the average working American, this model is actually identical to the Model S in drivetrain and costs a bit more. Sorry, folks.

Good news, though: many people anxiously await the Model 3 which is claimed to arrive in 2017 at a starting price in the $30k neighborhood. If Tesla can deliver on a car that’s even 1/4 as good as the Model S for 1/4 the price I think they’ll have a winner. Especially if the range is anywhere near the 300 mile mark.

2016 Ducati Scrambler: Nearly perfect.

Back in my single days my buddy and I would on occasion relate to one another experiences in courtship using automotive analogies. A Ferrari, for example, is very impressive by way of looks but the drawbacks are obvious – with high performance comes almost unbearable maintenance. When you’ve got such accentuated strengths, the weaknesses that accompany can be a real drag. Ferraris only carry 2 people comfortably, should never ever tow a trailer, get bad gas mileage, need a valve adjustment every 10k miles, and scrape on every speedbump. Sure a BMW 3-Series won’t do 12 second 1/4 miles or give you a stomach cramp doing a 0-60 run, but they’re pretty dang fast, come with a great stereo, can outrun a surprising number of cars on a twisty track, and can tow a decent sized trailer with a couple dirtbikes! And they’re less likely to cheat on you 😉

I give you the BMW 3-series of motorcycles: the Ducati Scrambler.

Is it the fastest 0-60? No. 3.4 seconds on a motorcycle is like 6.0 seconds on 4 wheels but the truth is you can beat 80% of cars on the road. Is it the fastest flat-out? Not even close, sorry. 120mph is kinda lame for a bike these days. BUT, it does weigh less than 400lbs and it DOES do a 12.0 second 1/4mi; you’ll smoke nearly anything under $200k! AND it can drift in the dirt while carrying a passenger (if you’re both a little nuts). That’s serious versatility, folks. If you own one 2-wheeled creation, I dare say this is it. The seating position is very comfortable, the footpegs are in the right place, the bars aren’t too low or too high, and it gets 43 mpg.

Did I mention it’s a wheelie machine? Since you’re more upright and have a nice wide grip on the bars this bike is really quite easy to rear with a modest degree of control. The very torquey v-twin makes just the right amount of power to get you in the air at low speeds and have a little fun. Props to Ducati on choosing an air-cooled setup on this bike, too. One less thing to worry about that lets you spend more time on the road and less in the garage.

I kind of feel like an old man now that I may have enjoyed a ride on a “standard” style bike instead of a thoroughbred racer, but this Duc is way too much fun.

2016 BMW i8: Much future, many fast, wow.

The i8 is the first BMW in mod’n times with super sweet swing-up doors. And they work great! I was expecting them to be difficult to close and cumbersome to open but was pleasantly surprised.
092_BMW_i8

Getting in, however is a bit of a chore. Pretend you have a mini-skirt on, turn around, bend at the knees while keeping your legs together and fall backward onto the seat. That’s the routine I found myself performing upon entry. Plus there’s a rather tall lip to overcome when you get into the car due to a carbon-fiber bucket the majority of the frame is composed of.

i8_Interior

One strange thing I’ve noticed about 2012+ BMW’s is they all have this v8-sounding throaty exhaust note regardless of engine configuration. The 328’s I-4, M4’s I-6, etc. The i8 is probably the most surprising vehicle to sing that song because it only has 3 fuel-burning cylinders. And it sounds fantastic.

Acceleration really feels like a standard petrol car, there’s no strange rush of space-god force attacking your rear like in a Model-S or whining electric noise like in the i3. All you can hear is the beautiful exhaust note an a subtle squish noise from your face smiling.

Supposedly if you drive like a grandma (who’s not a car enthusiast) you can get about 100mpg but in the real world and under normal driving with the occasional burn of glee I’m guessing you’ll see something like 40mpg. Pretty impressive for a car that can blast you to 60 mph in 4.2 seconds.

2016 Ducati Panigale: Executioner’s assistant

Ducati’s sport bikes are raw. I haven’t yet ridden one that didn’t immediately communicate that it preferred me dead. 999R, 1198S, doesn’t matter which one they all have a hellacious midrange and just when you thought the excitement was over they punch you in the face with ridiculous peak horsepower that doesn’t seem possible from a V-twin.

The Panigale is no exception. While it’s no 999 or 1198, it still makes plenty of power and is all Ducati. That means an aggressive riding position, rock hard seat, and some fun tech to go with it. Much like modern performance cars the Panigale has standard, sport, and race modes with gear indicator, lap timer, and shift light included.

14_mw_track-duc_899pan-10

Like most peaky sport bikes the 899 doesn’t get exciting until you’re past 6,000 rpm but with a redline of nearly 11,000 there’s plenty of room to burn through the gears. With the engine in the go-range it sounds celestial. And the stock exhaust is decently loud as is. Brembo brakes are standard up front and in the rear. Tons of feel and more than enough stopping power.

Overall it’s a track-day weapon and an around-town jaw-dropper. One thing the Italians always seem to get right is looks and they’ve done marvelously with this bike. One advantage over the 999 and older Duc’s is your butt doesn’t get slow-roasted by the exhaust. The lowering of the center of gravity by placing the exhaust down low I’m sure helps shave off a hundredth of a second on the track, but practically speaking it’s just nice not to get burned. Both the passenger’s legs and your rear end.

At $15,500 it’s not exactly cheap but the Italians have never shipped bright red sex appeal to the US at a bargain.